The Cow Conundrum

Hello all you happy people. Believe it or not, I was baking cookies when this idea came to me. I decided to come down here and type it up. It is fiction. If it has any resemblance to any person/place/thing/event, it wasn't on purpose, and there ain't nothin' I can do about it.

From the January 13th edition of the Doom-and-Gloom report:

It has been proven true: cows are the #1 cause of global warming.

"How can this be?" Ted Greenthum, head of CTWTWAGW (Campaign to Warn the World about Global Warming), raged. "How dare those cows have the GALL to have four stomachs? Don't they realize they're endangering everyone on this planet? How can they be so insensitive?"

When questioned about this, Bossy, the cow PR officer, responded with, "Moo."

"How dare they have to the gall to moo, stand there, and keep chewing their cud?" Greenthum was said to have nearly screamed. "We are demanding that people immediately stop eating beef!"

The President had reportedly asked the heads of the CTWTWAGW to calmly work with the leaders of the Anti-Global warming campaign to reach a suitable bipartisan agreement.

"I'm sure we can solve this easily." Bert Stand, head of Common Sense's Ltd., the anti-global warming organization, replied. "Let's all go down to McDonald's, we'll each order a couple 'a Big Macs, and we'll sit down and discuss this rationally."

This time, Greenthum was screaming. "How can you say that!?!" He responded. "We were just discussing how people shouldn't eat cows because it causes Global warming and will destroy the planet!"

Stand was said to have remained quiet for a moment, then replied, "But don't we have to eat the beef we already have? I mean, if we don't, then it will just decompose and add more Co2 to the Earth's atmosphere."

This discovery sent the CTWTWAGW into a frenzy. They immediately dispatched 32 1/2 scientist to affirm this discovery as quickly as possible.

"This is absolutely horrible." Linda Vegan, head spokeswoman of the CTWTWABGW, said in a press release. "Decomposing meat does have the possibility of releasing co2 into the atmosphere, so all beef must be eaten. However, if all beef is eaten, then meat packing companies will order and send out more beef. It's a never ending cycle of horror."

Currently, the CTWTWAGW is looking for a way around this conundrum. The Doom-and-Gloom Report will continue to keep you informed of further developments.

So, there it is. I tried to set it up like a newspaper story. I don't know why I wrote this, but I kinda like it. Yes, other than the fact that Gore and his cronies think cows cause global warming, I completely made this up. (Except the president. I didn't make him up.)

Well, there it is. I hope you enjoyed.

Story copyright 2009 to The All Real Numbers Symbol.

What part of Massive Economic Woe do you not understand?

Let's go back to the Great Depression, and have a look at Franklin D. Roosevelt. He tried to fix a depression once, a long time ago. Let's have a look at him.

In an effort to fix the economy, he composed a "New Deal" Let's take a good, long look at that New Deal.

Now, according to Wikipedia, there were three parts to the "first" New Deal:

1) Bank and monetary reforms:

With strident language Roosevelt hurled blame at businessmen and bankers: "Practices of the unscrupulous money changers stand indicted in the court of public opinion, rejected by the hearts and minds of men....The money changers have fled from their high seats in the temple of our civilization."

Now doesn't this remind you of something Congress did recently? Oh wait, they did that to the car makers. They let their pets Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac slip right on by.

2) The Economy Act - Now doesn't just that name right there remind you of something Congress did? The Economic Stimulus Package, anyone? But the one in the New Deal wasn't like that, at least not by the site I'm looking at.

3) Farm and Rural programs - We haven't gotten here yet, though I wonder if it's on Obama's to-do list.

Now, the public is convinced the New Deal helped get us out of the Depression - Wrong! FDR's New Deal prolonged the Great Depression:

Two UCLA economists say they have figured out why the Great Depression dragged on for almost 15 years, and they blame a suspect previously thought to be beyond reproach: President Franklin D. Roosevelt.

After scrutinizing Roosevelt's record for four years, Harold L. Cole and Lee E. Ohanian conclude in a new study that New Deal policies signed into law 71 years ago thwarted economic recovery for seven long years.

The New Deal fixed nothing - it just prolonged the pain. More about the New Deal here.

Now let's fast forward several decades, up to 2009. We are in the middle of a recession. Our new president, not even in office at the time I write this, is calling for another stimulus package. This one will cost us $1 trillion dollars. I wonder how many zeros you'd have to tack on that one ... I believe it's twelve. Either way, that's a heckuva lota money.

Obama is working hard to push this insanity. Check this out:

President-elect Barack Obama said Thursday the recession could "linger for years" unless Congress pumps unprecedented sums from Washington into the economy, making his highest-profile case yet on an issue certain to define and dominate his early presidency.

"I don't believe it's too late to change course, but it will be if we don't take dramatic action as soon as possible," Obama said in a speech set to be delivered at George Mason University in Fairfax, Va., outside Washington.

It was the fourth day in a row that Obama has made a pitch for a huge infusion of taxpayer dollars to revive the sinking economy he will inherit from President George W. Bush.

He wants to revive a sinking economy. Now doesn't this sound like something we've heard before? Oh, I don't know, the Great Depression, anyone?

2cents wrote about this on the blog There's My Two Cents:

So, history shows that recessions are 12-24 months, but Obama is saying this particular one will last well beyond that. Why is that? First of all, isn't that warning essentially an admission that what he's going to do won't work? And, isn't it also an admission that he knows it won't work? More importantly, when was the last time a recession stretched out into several years? Bingo - the Great Depression.

Failing banks, bad economy, people buying everything on credit, sure sounds like immediately prior to the Great Depression to me. This next quote comes from both the UCLA study and 2cents:

The conclusions of this study are critical to understand:

Roosevelt's role in lifting the nation out of the Great Depression has been so revered that Time magazine readers cited it in 1999 when naming him the 20th century's second-most influential figure.

…"The fact that the Depression dragged on for years convinced generations of economists and policy-makers that capitalism could not be trusted to recover from depressions and that significant government intervention was required to achieve good outcomes," Cole said. "Ironically, our work shows that the recovery would have been very rapid had the government not intervened."

The facts are clear: if Obama gets his way with this stimulus package, he
will transform this recession into another Great Depression.

Obama wants to put $1 trillion into the economy. The first stimulus didn't work. The banks apparently squandered the bailout they were given (at least, no one can locate that money they were given), the economy's still in the trash. Why does he think pumping more money in is going to work?

People, this is not going to work. At the best, it'll be like it was with Carter, the intrest rates, the shortages, etc. At the worst, it will be a second Great Depression. Pumping money into a sinking economy did not work the first, and it will not work a second time.

I don't care what you call me. Put down the Kool-Aid and listen to what's being said. By the way, where do you think he's gonna get the money to pay for this $1 Trillion dollar stimulus package? Taxes, perhaps? Or maybe he'll borrow it from China.

Massive economic woe, anyone?

Here's to Obama! A Kool-Aid Toast

Having returned from There's My Two Cents, I feel inspired to post this.

I took this picture sometime in the summer of 2008, and never posted it until now. But now I want it for reference.




And the Kool-Aid flowed like water...

(That, in case you were wondering, is actual cherry Kool-Aid in an bottle. I made up the label and photographed it. Myself personally, I dislike Kool-Aid. I try not to drink the stuff unless my blood sugar is low, or something. I don't know why. I've just never liked it.)

Oh well. L8R!

All Hail Barack Obama!!

You know, I don't care if you call me a racist. You'll do that anyway, so I'm going to have my say.

Today, we are preparing for four years of misery and woe. I don't think you'll be singing Obama's praises when your taxes go through the roof.

But today, in the spirit of Obama's inauguration, I've decided to do something outrageous and crude.

I'm going to throw my head back and laugh, of course.

Perhaps McCain wouldn't have lost if he had campaigned better.

Oh well. You can always make up for it later. Phone Atone:





Obama Win Causes Obsessisive Backers To See How Empty Lives Are:



Click Here to learn how to order your limited edition Barack Obama Commemorative Sunbeam.

And last but not least, click here to learn about Obama's new pet lapdog, named Media.

Have a happy tax hike!

-The All Real Numbers Symbol

To Kill An American

Cross-posted from Faultline USA, who cross-posted it from Right Truth.

Well, I was hoping to post up, "What part of Massive Economic Woe do you not understand?" first, but I saw this and had to pass it along. Check it out:

To Kill an American

You probably missed this in the rush of news, but there was actually a report that someone in Pakistan had published in a newspaper, an offer of a reward to anyone who killed an American, any American.

So an Australian dentist wrote an editorial the following day to let everyone know what an American is . So they would know when they found one. (Good one, mate!!!!)

"An American is English, or French, or Italian, Irish, German, Spanish, Polish, Russian or Greek. An American may also be Canadian, Mexican, African, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Australian, Iranian, Asian, or Arab, or Pakistani or Afghan.

An American may also be a Comanche, Cherokee, Osage, Blackfoot, Navaho, Apache, Seminole or one of the many other tribes known as native Americans.

An American is Christian, or he could be Jewish, or Buddhist, or Muslim. In fact, there are more Muslims in America than in Afghanistan . The only difference is that in America they are free to worship as each of them chooses.

An American is also free to believe in no religion. For that he will answer only to God, not to the government, or to armed thugs claiming to speak for the government and for God.

An American lives in the most prosperous land in the history of the world.

The root of that prosperity can be found in the Declaration of Independence, which recognizes the God given right of each person to the pursuit of happiness.

An American is generous. Americans have helped out just about every other nation in the world in their time of need, never asking a thing in return.

When Afghanistan was over-run by the Soviet army 20 years ago, Americans came with arms and supplies to enable the people to win back their country!

As of the morning of September 11, Americans had given more than any other nation to the poor in Afghanistan. Americans welcome the best of everything...the best products, the best books, the best music, the best food, the best services. But they also welcome the least.

The national symbol of America , The Statue of Liberty , welcomes your tired and your poor, the wretched refuse of your teeming shores, the homeless, tempest tossed. These in fact are the people who built America.

Some of them were working in the Twin Towers the morning of September 11 , 2001 earning a better life for their families. It's been told that the World Trade Center victims were from at least 30 different countries, cultures, and first languages, including those that aided and abetted the terrorists.

So you can try to kill an American if you must. Hitler did. So did General Tojo, and Stalin, and Mao Tse-Tung, and other bloodthirsty tyrants in the world. But, in doing so you would just be killing yourself . Because Americans are not a particular people from a particular place. They are the embodiment of the human spirit of freedom. Everyone who holds to that spirit, everywhere, is an American."

Please keep this going!
Pass this around the World.
Then pass it around again.
It says it all, for all of us.
Please do not just delete.
Pass it on first.
Thanks!

Amen. If you agree, pass it on.

Kiss eBay Goodbye...

So tell me, what do you like to collect? Me personally, I like manga. These Japanese comic books are made like real books (not the 15 page things we get here in America- most mangas have at least 175 pages.)

Mangas are also more expensive than the $3 or whatever it takes to buy an American comic book. Most mangas go for $10 a shot.

If you buy it brand new, that is. If you go eBay or the resale at Amazon.com, and you're shrewd, you might be able to get two gently used manga for what it would cost to buy one brand new.

Actually, if there's anything you shop for regularly on eBay, you should quit now. After Feb. 10th, we're through.

I was alarmed to learn this morning about a law passed about two years back, after the whole lead paint scare from China. Ye olde leftist media reports:

Mandatory federal standards will soon dictate how many children's products are made before they can be sold in stores. On Thursday, the president signed into law an expansive consumer product safety measure that includes, among many elements, tough new standards for lead and chemicals in products meant for kids younger than 12. It also calls for mandatory safety tests and sets forth more ways to keep kids safe in the event of a recall.

To parents who are sadly all too familiar with product safety, the law is a milestone.

I don't think the parents were told the whole story. The whole story is pretty bad. Hand Made Toy Alliance Explains:

In 2007, large toy manufacturers who outsource their production to China and other developing countries violated the public's trust. They were selling toys with dangerously high lead content, toys with unsafe small part, toys with improperly secured and easily swallowed small magnets, and toys made from chemicals that made kids sick. Almost every problem toy in 2007 was made in China.

The United States Congress rightly recognized that the Consumer Products Safety Commission (CPSC) lacked the authority and staffing to prevent dangerous toys from being imported into the US. So, they passed the Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act (CPSIA) in August, 2008. Among other things, the CPSIA bans lead and phthalates in toys, mandates third-party testing and certification for all toys and requires toy makers to permanently label each toy with a date and batch number. All of these changes will be fairly easy for large, multinational toy manufacturers to comply with. Large manufacturers who make thousands of units of each toy have very little incremental cost to pay for testing and update their molds to include batch labels.

For small American, Canadian, and European toymakers and manufacturers of children's products, however, the costs of mandatory testing will likely drive them out of business.

I found about this from a small store that has decided to close it's doors. The lady running the store can't afford to $4000 to have every toy in her store tested. Yes, you did read that correctly. It did say four thousand dollars.

If you're caught selling toys without certification, you recieve a two year prison sentence and have to pay a $100,000 fine.

Now, let's assume that it costs $4000 to have one of my mangas tested. Since the book is used, I decided that I will sell it on eBay for $5. But then I have to pay to have it tested, and then I'll have to ask you to pay me $4005 for the book, so I can make a profit and afford to sell it. You wouldn't buy it, and I wouldn't buy it either. This doesn't just apply to books, it also goes for all toys. So that right there will bring eBay to a halt. And even if I sold a T-rated manga, it still might come into contact with someone under the age of twelve, so I'll still have to have it tested.

Mangas are almost exculsively Japanese comics. I've heard of Korean ones, and American ones, but never ones from China. Every +Anima book I buy was printed in America. They bring the book over, they translate and edit it, then start printing and selling them in America.

People, this is madness. To test things from China makes sense. But what about things made in Europe, America, Japan, and Canada? It doesn't just apply to toys. Press Democrat says:

The new toy safety law is sweeping, requiring testing for dangerous lead levels and banned plastics in everything sold to children 12 and under. Going beyond toys and games, the law covers clothing, books, art supplies, backpacks and lunchboxes.

The version I heard was that anything someone younger than twelve could even come into contact with had to be tested, but you get the point.

“What we’re fearing is a lot of small companies will cut back on what they sell to the U.S. Some just may have to fold because they can’t meet the costs for the tests,” said Linda Kalb Hamm, owner of Early Work Toy Station in Petaluma. ..... “Obviously we all care about toy safety and this was an important law, but the government hasn’t thought it through.”

That's the understatement of the century. And isn't this a little delayed? The recalls took place in 2007, and the law didn't take effect until 2009.

Ann Arbor Business offers this:

At Ann Arbor Township-based product testing company NSF International, Bob Fryer pointed out all manufacturers have a responsibility to ensure their toys meet certain standards.

For Gold, the new law showcases the ultimate irony.

In order for his business - which boomed after safety fears over Chinese-produced toys led consumers to search for safer toys from companies like his - to afford the required safety testing, he found he will have to send his products to cheaper testing companies in China.

Oh, the irony.

February 10th, 2009. That's when this law takes effect. It won't just affect eBay. The Amazon resale, Goodwill, Hastings, small toy businesses, and any kind of thrift or resale shops are going to take a hit. The only thing that could stop it now would be a massive public outcry against it.

In the meantime, if you have anything you want to buy off or sell on eBay, I suggest you do it soon.

Happy New Year!

And so I return, back from vacation. Happy New Year everyone!

The blog is mostly back to normal... one of these days I'll get around to putting my proper banner back up. Eventually.

And I'd like to start off this year by clarifying something that's had me confused for a long time.

You know the Iraq War, right? America Won.

We might not be through over there, but we won the war.

Great News!

And the left said we'd fail. Thank you President Bush for never giving up, and thank you to our troops, who make it safe for us to live here.

And that's all for this round.

L8R PPL!!