From the Stupid Files: About Those Photos...

On the one hand, I'm torn. I want Obama to release those photos so everyone can see just what goes on back at Gitmo and therefore kill the liberal's main screaming point: "Torture! Torture!"

On the other hand, as soon as those are released, countries that actually engage in torture (For liberals, I mean "Not America") are going to laugh until they cry.

The thing is that what goes on at Gitmo... do you realize people over on FanFiction.Net can write stories that involve more torture and still never go above a T rating?

ABC News reports:

President Obama defended his decision to fight the release of photos showing detainee abuse, saying it would only put American troops in harms way and create a backlash against Americans.

Backlash against Americans, or against his administration? I tend to think it's the latter.

"The most direct consequence of releasing them, I believe, would be to further inflame anti-American opinion and to put our troops in greater danger," the president said before departing on his trip to Arizona. "Moreover, I fear the publication of these photos may only have a chilling effect on future investigations of detainee abuse."

How can you inflame anti-American opinion anymore than it already is? Heck, even liberals hate this country. The last free outpost in the world, and the biggest threat is actually on the inside.

Oh, and Barry? Muslims have always hated us. You're fighting a losing battle.

"I want to emphasize that these photos that were requested in this case are not particularly sensational, especially when compared to the painful images that we remember from Abu Ghraib," Obama said. "It's therefore my belief that the publication of these photos would not add any additional benefit to our understanding of what was carried out in the past by a small number of individuals."

I think I missed the Abu Ghraib thing, so I went out and looked it up. Ah, yes, Abu Ghraib. We were heaven help us, we actually engaged in torture. Real torture. We were actually playing by the Muslim's rules that time. (And you know liberals can't stand that!)

Now, in case you're wondering what kind of atrocities go on at Gitmo, Ann Coulter has the explanation:

Without any pretense of an argument, which liberals are neurologically incapable of, the mainstream media are now asserting that our wussy interrogation techniques at Guantanamo constituted "torture" and have irreparably harmed America's image abroad.

Only the second of those alleged facts is true: The president's release of the Department of Justice interrogation memos undoubtedly hurt America's image abroad, as we are snickered at in capitals around the world, where they know what real torture is. The Arabs surely view these memos as a pack of lies. What about the pills Americans have to turn us gay?

The techniques used against the most stalwart al-Qaida members, such as Abu Zubaydah, included one terrifying procedure referred to as "the attention grasp." As described in horrifying detail in the Justice Department memo, the "attention grasp" consisted of: "(G)rasping the individual with both hands, one hand on each side of the collar opening, in a controlled and quick motion. In the same motion as the grasp, the individual is drawn toward the interrogator."

The end.

This is what liberals are screaming about. This is insane.

But wait - it gets worse.

And that's not all! As the torments were gradually increased, next up the interrogation ladder came "walling." This involves pushing the terrorist against a flexible wall, during which his "head and neck are supported with a rolled hood or towel that provides a C-collar effect to prevent whiplash."

People pay to have a lot rougher stuff done to them at Six Flags Great Adventure. Indeed, with plastic walls and soft neck collars, "walling" may be the world's first method of "torture" in which all the implements were made by Fisher-Price.

As the memo darkly notes, walling doesn't cause any pain, but is supposed to induce terror by making a "loud noise": "(T)he false wall is in part constructed to create a loud sound when the individual hits it, which will further shock and surprise." (!!!)

Those of you who are squeamish, turn back now. Even Miss Coulter felt the irony:

If you need a few minutes to compose yourself after being subjected to that horror, feel free to take a break from reading now. Sometimes a cold compress on the forehead is helpful, but don't let it drip or you might end up waterboarding yourself.

Indeed. Now, for the continuing inhumane torture methods:

I will spare you the gruesome details of the CIA's other comical interrogation techniques and leap directly to the penultimate "torture" in their arsenal: the caterpillar.

In this unspeakable brutality, a harmless caterpillar is placed in the terrorist's cell. Justice Department lawyers expressly denied the interrogators' request to trick the terrorist into believing the caterpillar was a "stinging insect."

Human rights groups have variously described being trapped in a cell with a live caterpillar as "brutal," "soul-wrenching" and, of course, "adorable."

Good heavens, no! Not a caterpillar!!

What kind of caterpillar? A Monarch? Swallowtail? Cabbage White? Sweetheart Underwing? That's a big moth, so it might have a big caterpillar. Maybe one from inside an apple?
If it had to be a caterpillar, couldn't it have at least been one from a cercropia moth? At least that one looks moderately scary. But I digress.

There's My Two Cents has a bit more info on the waterboarding that liberals are screaming about.

...I don't recall ever seeing this procedure in such detail before, though I've read about it any number of times. It's amazing to watch in action, don't you think? No actual danger being posed to the person, but almost instant capitulation.

Torture: "the act of inflicting excruciating pain, as punishment or revenge, as a means of getting a confession or information, or for sheer cruelty"

Is this torture? No way. Anyone who thinks this is torture has their eyes closed to what real torture is. Slicing and dicing body parts is torture. Electrical shocks, crushing of fingers, and permanent physical damage is torture. Forcing someone to watch while their spouse or child is raped and cut apart is torture. Those are the things that our enemies do (it's well documented, if you don't believe me).

We tip the guy down and pour little bit of water up his nose.

Waterboarding is not torture because there is no permanent physical damage, nor is there any mental anguish [radical Islamic terrorists strive for and worship death, so there is no anguish found in the panic reaction they talked about in this video]. Waterboarding is a phenomenally effective way to get information out of captives quickly without harming them. Our own soldiers go through it as part of their training.

Follow the link to watch the video he's talking about.

I think we can safely say that Crazyville - located in Washington D.C., in case you wanna visit - has once again taken stupid to a whole new level.

I looked at the Abu Ghraib photos, okay? "Oh no! Our eeeevilll soldiers stripped someone! They threatened them with dogs!" Sorry 'bout that. Next time, we'll make sure the soldiers use actual methods of torture, you know, knives, whips, chains, that sort of thing.

Which, by the way, that stuff does not happen at Gitmo. Liberals are running around screaming that the sky is falling when they've only been bonked on the head by a tiny, half-developed acorn. If there's anything about this country that deserves scorn, well, let's just say it's not our soldiers or Gitmo.

I think this video kind of puts it in perspective, even if the ending is kind of weird.



Compared to what other countries do to their prisoners, liberals have NOTHING to be complaining about.